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Singles Platforms | Consonance (Gleichklang)
Singles platforms have taken over the function of the personal ads in newspapers and magazines that now play hardly any role. In this respect, such online dating sites have many similarities to dating apps, which have already been discussed in detail. The chapter on these platforms is therefore kept short because most of the aspects presented for dating apps also apply to singles platforms.
Instead of placing a personal ad, people looking for a partner can register on a dating platform and create a personal profile there. In addition to a free text and photos, at least information on age, location, gender, height, and weight is collected; often, however, many additional characteristics, interests, and special features are requested, with the answers usually being voluntary.
The search is left to the users by freely scrolling through a smaller or larger number of more or less superficial search criteria that can be selected anew by the users for each search. There is no psychologically based matchmaking.
On dating sites, creating your own profile is almost always free of charge. Subsequently, profiles can be searched free of charge based on criteria such as age, location, or gender.
Sometimes communication with other participants is also free of charge. In that case, an online dating platform usually finances itself through advertising. In other cases, free communication with other participants is not possible or only possible to a very limited extent. For dating platforms that charge fees, only the paid offers make sense.
Among these dating sites, countless specialized providers also offer their services:
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Only for the wealthy, beautiful, overweight, good‑looking, role‑players, BDSM enthusiasts, or Gothic fans, vegetarian or vegan people, single parents, asexuals, people with disabilities … The list could be continued almost endlessly.
What connects members on such a specialized online dating site is exclusively the one shared characteristic around which the matchmaking revolves.
So check carefully whether the respective characteristic is really a sustainable prerequisite for a relationship:
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Such a specialized provider is useful for you if the matchmaking topic is so important to you that you want to dedicate your partner search to this one central topic.
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Using a specialized site can also be useful if you encounter too much rejection on other platforms due to your own characteristics (e.g., asexual, fuller figure, disability) and no longer want to put up with it.
Keep in mind that members of singles platforms, just like those on dating apps, do not necessarily have to be exclusively or primarily focused on a serious partner search. The easy and quick access and the free scrolling through profiles attract people with different motives.
Many dating sites lack the clear focus of their external presentation, advertising measures, and the actual offer on the search for lasting partnerships. As a result, such platforms attract many people whose main motive is not building a long‑term partnership. Moreover, the free scrolling through profiles, similar to dating apps, promotes a non‑committal consumer, game, and fun attitude.
Accordingly, singles platforms have many members who are more interested in flirting, eroticism, or virtual chats. These dating sites cater to this clientele, which is less interested in a serious partner search, through the simplicity and high speed with which profiles can be created, the voluntary nature of many details, the non‑commitment, and the availability of free basic functions or even complete free access.
In addition, the availability of freely searchable alternatives on such online dating platforms can worsen the selection:
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The more alternatives are provided, the more superficial the process becomes by which participants select which profile they want to contact. This increases, as with dating apps, the danger that rather unsuitable people will find each other.
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There is no preselection based on fit. This increases the playful character of dating websites, which here too, similar to dating apps, appeal more strongly to aspects of entertainment, variety, and fun.
Subjectively, members of online dating sites have a lot of freedom through the ability to scroll and contact without limits.
For example, with dating apps like Tinder, the profiles displayed are determined by algorithmic processes, and closer profile viewing or even contacting is only possible if both sides express interest. For further profile suggestions, many dating apps require extra payment.
In contrast, members of singles platforms can freely view the entire database and search it according to specified selection options. They can generally contact any other member, although on paid platforms this may require the use of the premium function on both sides for getting to know each other.
People who can freely scroll through profiles have the impression that they can better control the selection process. This can increase interest and satisfaction. In fact, however, the free search should be viewed critically because, according to psychological studies, an increase in the number of possible candidates tends to lead to a poorer search result:
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Wu and Chiou (2009) presented participants in a study on online dating with different numbers of profiles to view. In addition, based on the participants’ own details about their ideal partners, the degree of fit of the individual suggestions was calculated. The result showed that the actual fit of the profiles selected by the participants themselves as interesting was lower the more suggestions had been presented to them. The scientists concluded that more options lead to poorer decisions in partner search.
The free scrolling on singles platforms can encourage a usage pattern in which attention quickly wanders from one profile and contact to the next. In this respect, with dating sites, as with dating apps, there is a risk that communication behavior remains or becomes superficial and that deeper emotional communication does not take place.
With their overall low focus on finding a lasting relationship and their strongly playful‑non‑committal character, the structure of these online dating platforms does not promote willingness to commit.
Also, with singles platforms and dating apps, the barrier to registration is low. Therefore, you must expect that many people will look at your profile who are not looking for a partner but are looking out of curiosity or for other motives.
Dating sites and dating apps are basically similar offers. When corresponding dating platforms also provide apps, singles platforms and dating apps almost merge into each other.
Partnerships can undoubtedly develop through dating sites, and even lasting stable and happy partnerships. However, there are also a number of structural features shared with dating apps that make it more difficult for such relationships to develop through singles platforms. Moreover, individual people may also be at risk of slipping into addictive behavior on such platforms and reducing their willingness to commit.
However, those who are aware of the opportunities and risks and steer their own search in a reflective manner can certainly open up additional opportunities for their own partner search by using a singles platform, or satisfy other motives in the area of flirting and eroticism, without this necessarily leading to addictive behavior or having a damaging effect on their own willingness and ability to commit.
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